Both Indians and India are fucked up and they will remain so. Look at the banner picture above! It says, “Dogs and Indians are Not Allowed”. We have employed the Supreme Court of India to disprove the above statement! We have decided to eliminate the dogs. For these Indians India was great in the past and at its worst in the past. There is no difference between Public and Private spaces. What then what constitutes public and private space?
India’s basic focus is always public. Indians are the worst at distinguishing private and public spaces. One strange reason could be that we lack privacy in our homes. Traditional and modern joint family systems often involve multiple generations living closely together, in large households. For those who can afford, there is live-in household help, which leads to more varied living arrangements. There is no opportunity for privacy. In urban settlements, overcrowding and scarce space are common. Here what remains private becomes public.
Lack of privacy and unacceptable public behavior never bothered Indians. Technology, Internet, and increasing wealth have given us the ability to be private. But things take a strange turn in India. Take mobile phones: we like to use them (a private convenience) in public on speaker mode, watching cricket matches, reels, and films at full volume on small screens in places like restaurants, shops, streets, and other non-private areas. Nobody has taught us that it is inappropriate to do so, and we may be disturbing and being inconsiderate to others.
Indians don’t respect personal space. When standing in queues, they get too close to the person in front. They worry they might not reach the front of the queue. We are accustomed to crowds and queues in sacred sites & transportation. The growing middle class and the wealthy can avoid crowds by paying a premium or having others do many uncomfortable tasks for them. Despite our wealth and status, we believe that the pie is limited and that we must keep pushing forward to succeed or we risk falling behind!
I grew up in a rural small-town India. There was no pushing of any kind due to the low population density. However, public urination, defecation, spitting and loud talking were common. Then and now, there is an acute lack of public toilets. We are still noisy, fearing we won’t be heard above others talking. Too much noise pollution!
The Indian public behavior lacks etiquette – a set of rules for polite conduct & showing consideration for others. These unwritten rules guide how we interact in an acceptable and appropriate way. Citizens in the West usually learn this at home, in educational institutions, and through good governance. As more Indians travel abroad to countries with clear rules for public behavior, such as littering, using public transport, respecting queues, and eating or drinking in public, the question arises: why can’t we behave this way? When we see Indians acting in an unacceptable manner, we feel both outraged and ashamed.
Indians are quite unfamiliar with travel and public behavior norms. Those who have recently started travelling also lack experience. They behave abroad as they do at home. Many
countries are discouraging Indian travelers. Our religions, foods and customs vary significantly across — north, south, east and west. There are guidelines for private life, such as which hand to use when eating, who eats first, where alcohol is permitted, and norms regarding hierarchy and family control. These guidelines mostly relate to religion and patriarchy. However, there are no fixed rules for public behavior. Public life became an extension of home life. When away from the control of family and elders, we act like spoiled children given freedom for the first time. We ignore the fact that we are in a public space and behave like beasts. We litter, spit, shout and be aggressive in public places, oblivious to others around us.
How do we agree on and develop norms for good public behavior? What is good etiquette? What can promote good public conduct? Some advocate civic education in schools. However, the family is the first institution that an individual experiences. How do parents become good role models? How do we educate parents? Agreeing on basic public behavior is not difficult. It takes time and persistence to develop civic sense. Fines and disincentives for anti-social behavior have proven ineffective because those responsible for enforcement often ignore them.
Given the size and diversity of the country, innovative and clever campaigns are needed on the social media, television and radio. Visual media can be used to highlight examples of good civic sense and public behavior. The Indian society is gradually shifting towards a more individualistic culture. It is moving away from a family-centered one. Individualism requires privacy. Modernity calls for a change in attitude, which takes time. Changes in norms of private and public behavior can only happen if they are done intentionally and deliberately. Until then, we shall all remain fucked-up.
About the Author
Dr. K. Raja Gopal Reddy is a seasoned internationally qualified Insurance professional. What you are reading here, may not answer all the questions we have, but has the absolute power of asking unsettling questions which increase the interest in the strange world, and show the contradictory wonders lying just below the surface of the commonest things of life. Look at this disturbing but beautiful thought of Friedrich Nietzsche “God is dead. God remains dead. And we have killed him”.
Dr. Reddy can be reached at: raja66gopal@gmail.com
